Well it's happened. My swearing has reached EPIC proportions. I mean...Fucking epic.
Ryan and the kids have noticed that I will drop the F-bomb, and a shit any old time. I'm so thankful that my kids realize that they're just words. But yet, they are NOT allowed to utter them, themselves.
However. The other day. I was in Miles' room, and he came strolling in and must have realized he forgot something and said, "Oh shiiii.....(pause)...nevermind mom!" And ran out. AFTER making this face
You know he was about to finish the word. But caught himself JUST.IN.TIME.
You may ask, "Did you get mad SJT? Did you punish him?" How can I be mad? I can't. I laughed and busted him. Then I heard them. Those turds. Ryan and Claire told me I need to "work on my swearing."
So now I have a swear jar. Well...it's more like a swear wine glass. I have to put a quarter in it each time I swear. At least each time the kids hear me swear. (I told Ryan I'd go broke if it was for ALL swearing.) I realize I'm the worst mom. I never used to swear. I must be low on vitamin D.
Either way. I have the stupid swear police on my ass daily. Claire gets simply giddy if she even hears me say dangIT and has to check to see if I said DANG it or DAMN it. She's a shit. It started yesterday and I already have quite a collection of quarters in the glass. I've just given up at this point and put my bag of quarters next to the glass.
Ryan said that in no time at all, he'll be able to get the XBox One or the PS4. Or probably both with my fucking mouth. I'm blaming the weather. Stupid fucking Polar Fucking Vortex.
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