It's happening again

I really need a break from all this crap. Claire of course is at it again. Woke up in the middle of the night, proceeded to kneel in front of the wall, and whisper her damn head off.

Seriously. I have no idea whatsoever, who she is chatting with, but I wish they would stop contacting her at 3 am. It's been going on for almost a year. On and off.

First it was the Man and the Boy, then Diego. And now..who the hell knows.

All I know is, I wake up to whispering. Not crystal clear whispering. Just hazy-please-be-a-dream whispering. Then I look over and Claire is kneeling in front of the wall. KNEELING! Like she is praising some kind of other world being. Ugh.

I have taken to letting the kids "sleep over" in my room when Ryan is out of town. Which as of late, has been a lot. But they have to sleep on the floor in their little fold out sofas. Well when the whispering starts, I just tell Claire to get into bed with me. The first time I did that, the kneeling stopped.

But now....not so much. GAAAHHH!!!! She is kneeling facing the headboard. WHISPERING.

Last night she just kept kneeling, whispering, "So...what should we do next?" Or, "So what were you saying?" She kept being interrupted by dear old me. Politely asking her to stop talking. Really. I was very polite for 4 in the morning. I would say, "Claire, I need to sleep. You are being rude. If you want to blab blab blab all night long, go to your own room. Shut the door. And leave mommy alone."

She would lay down everytime. But shortly there after I would hear..."So that was being rude. Mommy wants me to be quieter."

And so once again....I got nothing. Maybe I should call that show, Paranormal State. Maybe I just don't really want to know. Maybe if I found out, I would have the same face Claire's preschool teacher had when I told her about it.

I had to warn the poor woman that Claire had been up since 3ish and may be a bit tired. I told her what actually happened, because hey, she asked. But when she looked at me, I swear, I saw pure fear. That would be me if I found out what was REALLY chatting up my poor daughter at 3 in the morning. Cause you know it isn't gonna be good. No shit.

Yucky

Not feeling very bloggy lately. Not much has happened. Went to the Mayo Clinic. Definitely not what I expected. But...hopefully things will work out for the best. Nothing to worry about though. At least not now.

Ryan is out of town...AGAIN! I have the most pathetic photo you'll ever see. THIS is how my kids get to see their dad. On the positive, they never would have been able to do this several years ago. So there's that. But I never thought Max Headroom was cool back in the day, and I am sure as shit, my kids would rather have Ryan home.

We were at my parents house tonight to see my sister and my nephew. I got a cute photo of the kids, but it's pure torture getting 3 kids to sit still, and smile at the same time. They can't do it. Even if they try. Someone ALWAYS goes and fucks it up. Case in point. All three really. I mean seriously. Yes yes they're cute and all, but Miles looks totally bored, E looks like he is deranged, and Claire looks like, hmmmmm.....what can I do to destroy you?

Oooh...done being crabby. Here is a photo of some early Halloween goodness. Our local supermarket does a Boo Bash for the kids. My kids love it. I do have to say, I was able to contribute to Miles' Obi Wan Kenobi costume. Although Ryan made the whole thing, Miles requested he be Obi Wan from the FIRST movie. So he needed a rat tail that laid on his right shoulder. Ha ha..I got to braid some brown yarn. My big fat contribution. But at least it made Miles feel super cool. And by super cool...I mean..."SOOOPER COOOOL" Claire was a princess mouse. I just can't do the plain old princess. Ugh...who would have thought, my girl would love princesses.

My BFF

My BFF is sick. Oddly over the years, we have been sick with the same things. Seriously. She gets sick. And then a few weeks, days later I get the same symptoms. Or vice versa. It is a little strange.

When I first met her, she was dating Ryan's best friend. Who was also at the time my roommate. Ryan and his BFF worked for her dad as well. Fixing pagers and cell phones. Yes...Ryan has ALWAYS been a techie geek.

I didn't try to get to know her. And frankly, I think she thought I was a bit too chipper for her taste. And in my defense, I was pretty excited about the Apple Orchard when she called...so there's that. But...we decided we should be friends because our husbands grew up together, were friends, and really were like brothers. So "J" and I became friends.

At first we were "friends". But something changed. We grew to rely on each other for all types of things. Ryan and I are godparents to their kids. And they are godparents to ours.

We have seen each other through babies, loss of babies, sickness, family drama, and just about everything else you can think of.

She is someone I can talk to on the phone everyday about nothing. But when it's important, she'll listen. And we share everything with each other. I mean EVERYTHING. Things our husbands don't want to hear about, and probably things we wouldn't tell them anyway.

Some of my best memories are with her. We laugh a lot. Even when we are sick. We call each other, and laugh about stupid shit. It's what we do.

In the past, there have been times we haven't always "connected" so well. But we are able to be honest with each other and work through it.

I think I'm lucky. I have 3 sisters. And then I have "J". She's closer to me then my own sisters sometimes.

What prompted this mushy love letter to my BFF you ask? Simple. I found this photo today. It was taken years ago on some trip to the Boundary Waters. Some things are just nice to see NOT change.

Oh yeah, she's taller then me too.

My hair

*Inspired by my friend Kelly's Blog*

Kelly recently posted about his new living situation. He has moved in with two women. Good for him you say? Yeah..I guess, but really one of his most recent posts regarding this new co-habitation got me thinking.

He mentioned one of his roommate's hair is everywhere. He has a very lovely photo of it on a white plate. I'm not sure if it was there randomly or if in fact he placed it there for visual and dramatic effect. Either way. It was hair on a plate. Pretty appetizing if you ask me.

I remember long ago, about 11 years ago, when Ryan and I first started living together. He made comments about my hair being everywhere. I am a Korean woman. I had long, thick, black, coarse hair, that fell out all of the damn place.

And now I have short hair, but it is all pretty much the same. Poor Ryan. There is always hair on the floor. In the bed. On the furniture. In the vacuum cleaner. In the car. On him for god's sakes.

And he also now has a Korean daughter, who's hair is ALL OVER THE PLACE. Ha ha ha...it's an epidemic.

I don't think he will ever EVER get used to it. But it will forever be around.

So get comfortable with it Kelly. It doesn't stop unless you shave her head in the middle of the night.

I too, would take a lovely photo of all the hair in our house, but Ryan just vacuumed so it's a little scarce at present time.

Suck it Doctor Paine!

Tomorrow I go to the Mayo Clinic to meet with a "Rare liver disease" specialist. I am looking forward to it. I have been passing on the idea of going there for years, because most of my life, I had the idea, the Mayo was for really sick people. Not for stupid old me and my stupid old liver.

But lately, I have been feeling gross. Sicker than usual. Crabbier than usual. In more pain than usual. So I'm going. New symptoms make me nervous. And the nurse, who checked me in said, "sweetie, you ARE really sick." Not a good start down the road of positive thinking, but I'll work on that. Really I will.

In 1999 I was being treated by a doctor at the University of Minnesota. Dr. Paine. Seriously with that name? I know, right? He told me I would be lucky to make it to my 40th birthday. That asshole. But I was young. And 40 seemed a very long way off and kinda old. So upon hearing that diagnosis, I bailed from his treatment, and have been only followed by Gastroenterologists and my general practitioners.

But with new symptoms, I have no idea if it is A) liver disease kicking my ass. B) Old age. C) 40 years old is NOT that far away now. Shit.

So off to the Mayo. Finally. And they say, the only study they found from the U of M is one done on little ol' me in 1998. So...glad to have a specialist who knows what the hell is going on. Cause I only have 4 years left until 40, and I don't plan on leaving anytime soon. I hope they don't want to talk transplant again. No thanks. Not for me.

The best part, is Ryan and I will actually get to spend our anniversary together. Without kids. It will just be in Rochester MN surrounded by doctors. Meh...no biggie. We've done a lot worse I guess.

I don't sew

I'm not a sewer. I just learned how to hem my pants for the love of God. And for a 5 foot lady, that's kinda stupid to learn so late in life. But I did. I also attempted my first "sewing" project this last spring. Make curtains for the kid's playhouse.

Yeah....did it work out? Not so much. I just ended up buying that iron on stuff that is sort of like sewing. But makes me look cool in the eyes of a 5 and 3 year old.

But this fall, Miles really really wanted to be Obi Wan Kenobi for Halloween. I was not about to spend 40 dollars for a costume that consisted of a brown tablecloth, and ANOTHER fucking lightsaber that he has already. So I said, I'll try. Ha ha...no I didn't try. Not at all. Not one little iota of bit. I'm a bad mom.

Enter....."Super Dad!!!!"

Yep. You read that right....dad. Ryan found, online, HOW TO MAKE a jedi robe and vest. So he carefully crafted it with an old bed sheet, and some pants that aren't fit to be worn, ever. And I have to say, it looks pretty damn good. It drives me crazy that he did it. Only because I pride myself on being the BEST parent. Ha ha ha..just kidding Ryan. But really. I don't sew. At all. Ever.

But to my glee filled heart, neither does Ryan. He used the sticky iron on shit too. I am still #1. Kinda. He did make it. I just watched.

Here is a "rough draft" of the costume. Ryan has since tidied up the edges and Miles now has a belt too. All we need is gray facial hair and a lightsaber.

Claire's costume was easy breezy. My mother bullied me into getting her a princess mouse costume. I miss my tomboy. Hear that Claire?

Miles is a smarty pants.

Tonight we had Miles' first ever Kindergarten conferences. I must say....he is smart!

His teacher looooovvveeessss him. Duh. She said he is doing really well in class academically, and that he is socially a wonderful child. That's right. He's awesome.

It sure makes up for all the crying that occurred that first day of school. When he started school the only thing that he wanted to share with us, was to tell Ryan, "my teacher doesn't wear glasses and is white like you dad." That was it. Very astute I must say, but not very informative regarding what he did in class itself.

Miles is coming out of his shell, making friends, and being his charming hilarious self. I love it.

On the way home, Ryan said to me, "he is so like me." It was like he was sitting at his own Kindergarten conference 30 years ago.

I did warn Miles' teacher, who will without a doubt get Claire in 2 years, that Claire is nothing...NOTHING like her brother.

I will feel like I'm sitting in MY Kindergarten conference 30+ years ago. Yikes. Poor teacher.

I only complain about the weather when it's hot out.

But....what is up with all the rain this month? It's October in Minnesota. It should be crisp and sunny and beautiful with fall colors.

I should be able to go to the North Shore and hike with a sweatshirt and jeans on, but not gloves and a scarf.

It's barely above 40 degrees and it's supposed to *gulp* snow on Saturday morning a bit. I love winter too, but really mother nature? Skipping the most beautiful season?

I barely see any color changes. I didn't make an apple pie yet. I haven't been to the orchard to get apples and a pumpkin. My kids haven't had a runny nose from it being chilly out yet. I haven't crunched leaves under my feet for half a block when walking with the kids. What the hell?!?

I still hold out hope that Halloween will be perfect. If it's not, then well, day after Thanksgiving shopping better be amazing. I'm just sayin'.

This didn't happen in my backyard this year. I'm a little bitter.

What I want isn't asking too much.

I haven't posted in a while. I've been sick. I know I know...big surprise. Not sick H1N1 sick, but really sick. I'm actually headed to the Mayo Clinic on the 19th. Thank God for that....this is not what the post is about.

Here is a list of things I was thinking about over the past few days. I would like a few things to happen. Nothing dramatic. Just a couple of things. Not for any particular reason, but because...I want them to change or be better, or just do what the hell I want.

1. I want my kids to NOT write on each other with markers. They're 3 and 5 for crying out loud. Really? (this one shouldn't even be here. They totally know better, but because I'm too weak to fight them....this is what happens.)

2. I want to have a Dian Friday again. Not soon, but again. Sometime.

3. In an effort to "battle the bulge", I found that becoming extremely sick, eating virtually nothing for 2 weeks, and barely getting water down, is NOT, I repeat NOT the best diet plan out there. Besides, yoga pants are pretty much one-size-fits-all. Learn a new healthy lifestyle. (this one is funny. It really is.)

4. I would love to go to the North Shore with my family and hike in the fall air. It's already fall here. Cold, sunny, crisp, and yells for me to make apple pie. I would like to eat apple pie.

5. I want to do a playdate again. Now the kids have started school, I can't do them anymore. It's disrupting my life. I don't have playdate time. Which means no grown up time with their parents/my friends. *sigh*

Ok....now just somethings the kids have said to me over the past few weeks, that are definitely things I wish I had a video camera to catch.

I asked Miles why he was watching his sister's Barbie princess movies. He told me, "it helps me understand the girls at school better mom."

Claire told Ryan he had "a booger hanging out of his nose, like a monkey hangs out of a tree."

Miles told me he tries to sit with the girls at circle time and they keep moving away from him. I asked him how come. He said, "because they're girls and they don't like me and C (C is his new friend)." I asked him what he did about it. He said, " I told them, "girls I'm done with this business!" and then just ignored them."

Now...I'm going to attempt to make dinner. Dry toast and water. Ha ha...my mom used to tell me that if I was bad when I got older, I would go to jail and they would only serve me bread and water. Apparently you CAN survive on it.